a few facts for you to digest

if your boss asks you to willingly violate a labor law, and you realize later that what you did could totally get your ass fired, you should go to the union. STAT. the offense might be minor in and of itself, and when you're asked you might think, "whatever," but you know what? your boss, especially if your boss is an asshole, doesn't really care if you lose your job or not, so long as they make gross (or quota, or figures, or whatever they use to call "money"). the day after you go the union management will spend a lot of time trying to sweet talk you and tell you that you didn't need to go to the union in the first place. this, my friends, is bullshit. just because they look bad and now their superiors know what jackoffs they are, doesn't mean you did anything wrong. covering your own ass, making sure that you don't get canned for doing something your boss asked you to do, is not only okay, but totally commendable. if you belong to a union, don't be afraid to use it. after all, you pay for the privilege, and sometimes the union is the only thing other than yourself watching out for you.

so what happened? i was asked to work but not clock in. not because they weren't going to pay me for my hours, but because i was working late at night and they wanted to avoid anyone knowing i was working earlier than i am supposed to. i was told repeatedly that i had to keep it "quiet" or else i would get in trouble. also, i got screwed out of two hours of sunday pay, which where i work at is time and a third, as well as over 6 p.m. pay (another twenty cents an hour). at the time i was asked, it was late and i didn't care. i just wanted to get my shit counted and get out. later, when i realized what i was asked to do, and how i got screwed, and that i could be fired i felt both angry and ashamed for having been such a chump. i mean, come on. my mom's in a union, my pop and i did nothing but study marxist and socialist theory our first few years of college, and i thought i knew my shit. the change in my attitude and awareness has crept up on me; after about six months of being jerked around, of being expected constantly to "take one for team" and/or "be a good team player" i realized that i am indeed, totally getting played. this grocery store is a fucking mess. my senior manager is a two-faced, snarky creep of a bitch and i'm tired of being taken for a ride. when i started i was glad for the job, when pop was sick i was glad for the long weekends, and when i got my new job i totally loved it. i still love what i actually do, but i'm finding the politics real hard to swallow. what makes it hard is that on paper i can see how royally fucked over i'm being, and want to just quit and run for the hills (which is actually the plan right now) but in real life i work with a whole bunch of nice folks who i honestly care about. i like my co-workers, i like the work i do, i feel like i'm part of a community that i enjoy. the thing is, my personal relationships and capital there don't translate into rent money or car insurance. it doesn't even translate very well into actual groceries! the store i work at is crazy expensive, and i can't afford to buy my food there. i also can't pay all my bills every month and the us department of education kind of wants to garnish my meager wages. awesome!

it might have been foolish to hope things would work out and get better, but oh well. maybe that means i'm saving my real bitterness and cynicism for later in life.