a date!

i haz it!

i admit, i did a bit of stalking this afternoon after finishing up my christmas shopping. i talked my roommate into going by a certain big chain restaurant when i knew grocery-boy was working. i was a nervous wreck on our way there, because i wasn't sure if he would be pleased to see me or annoyed. i mean, work isn't always the funnest place, and having people drop by unannounced can be fun or it can be irritating. you have a 50/50 chance, and i didn't want it to freak him out or upset his day.

long story short, when i finally got his attention with a "psst!" and a wink*, he seemed happy to see me. he asked what i was doing, and i said, "um, i told you i was going to stalk you." he laughed and said, "finally!" then he laughed and said it again and then i really wanted to kiss him right then and there.

the party for tomorrow night has been postponed due to inclement weather. i asked him if he'd still like to do something this week and he said he would love to. we both work quite a bit up until christmas, and after going through our schedules we realized that tomorrow is still the best night to hang out. the good news is that a) i still get to see him and b) i don't have to drag my sister to a party where she doesn't know anyone. bonus round: c) i get a little more one-on-one time with him, instead of having to deal with the anxiety of getting to know him as well as all his friends. we all know i'm a nervous nelly; the less nerves for me the better.

this might all crash and burn, and it might do so in a spectacular way. i won't lie and say i feel nonchalant about this date: i'm pretty fucking stoked. he seems super nice, very easy to talk to and get along with, and he has the kind of dimples you can drive a car into. i want to bite him. i want to pin him down and see if he tastes as good as he looks. i want to know more about him, and i want to know it now. even if it's all for naught, this feeling of excitement, of the unknown, of sparkling anticipation is worth it. this is the feeling that we all try to bottle and save for later. this is the rush we chase and why we keep going out with people even if 99% of the time we're left in a situation that either hurts us or is completely unimpressive or uninspiring. this feels good. not as good as it's going to feel when i get my hands on him, though, i hope.

*i didn't realize i winked. i never do it intentionally, because when i try, it looks retarded. however, i tend to do it when i'm not thinking about it consciously, and my roommate totally caught it. i wasn't trying to be sassy! i swear!

p.s. i looked all over the internets for the j. mascis version of this song, which is the one i prefer. if you want to hear that, go check out martin + me. thanks!