2.5 days and counting

when i started this last six-day stretch of work before vacation, i was pretty sure i was going to go bat-shit-crazy before the end of it. i couldn't possibly imagine actually getting through the six days and to texas without losing my mind, but now that i only have two more days of work to go, plus half a day of dealing with airline stuff i'm feeling a lot more calm and better about the whole thing. i can indeed get through this, and i will be in texas before i know it. my folding toothbrush and i are ready.

texas!

did i ever tell you about my texas t-shirt?
this is me at 17*, in the shirt i basically lived in as a senior. i found it at some thrift store, and wore it until it basically fell apart. it was old when i bought it, extraordinarily soft, and was perfect for me because i had this fascination with texas that none of my friends shared. growing up on an island made everything big seem a lot cooler than where i was, and texas was huge. plus, every texan i'd ever seen or met seemed to love their state, with this ferverence that you didn't find in the pacific northwest. let's face it, where i come from being excited about shit just isn't cool. if you've ever been to a sporting event in seattle, you know that our crowds are subdued at best. (or maybe that's just what i've seen.) in bars, everyone sits around looking bored, talking about how much stuff sucks, and god forbid you wash your hair. that adolescent affect is something we don't seem to shake, but i loved the idea of a whole state where people had this sense of pride. dude, they write songs about texas. i was young and idealistic and listening to a lot of lyle lovett at the time. i wanted to go to texas so bad, but didn't know anyone who lived anywhere farther south than south dakota. as i got older i realized not every texan knew all the words to the deep in the heart of texas, or even loved texas, but i still liked the sound of it. maybe it's the romance of the south, the idea of the pioneer spirit that i like. i don't know. i just know texas has always been on my list of states to visit.

i don't have that shirt anymore, but i'm still pretty excited about seeing texas. i also kind of wish i was still as cute and thin as i was when i had that shirt, but oh well. it's amazing how much i hated how i looked when i was 17 but i see photos now and realize it wasn't that bad. if i could go back and talk to myself at that age i would ask myself nicely to be a little easier on me.

*i don't have a scanner, so i just took a photo of a photo. classy.

texas:vacation