cut it out

meet my mean pea. it's a ganglion cyst, formerly known as a bible cyst. it lives between the thumb and forefinger of my left hand. i've had it for a long time, although for a few years it was just a weird crease on my palm; it took a while for the cyst itself to work its way up to the surface. ganglion cysts aren't dangerous or cancerous, they're normally just annoying. you can smash them with something heavy and get rid of them (you know, like bibles!), you can wait to see if they go away (many do), or you can see a doctor and have them cut it out of you. either way, unless it affects your range of motion or causes a lot of pain, most doctors suggest just letting them be.

my mean pea is kind of a dick. it makes knitting for longer than half and hour hurt. it sometimes sends a shooting, burning pain from my thumb down to my wrist. if i bump it into anything it hurts like a mother-humper. my grip on that side, while never stellar since i'm a righty, has gotten weaker. i have a hard time opening up jars. i often tell the kids i need help because the pea is acting up. i can't write or type for long periods of time. it looks funny. in short, the mean pea and i are not very good friends.

since i've had it for so long, the doctor thinks it might be time to excise it. i have an appointment with an orthopedic surgeon on monday to take a look at it, and while part of me is all, "yay! cut the fucker out!" the part of me that worries just wants to know how much it will cost and whether or not it's even worth it. there's a good chance it'll just come back. of course, having my hand back would also rule, even if it doesn't last forever. before i get all mopey and "why bother" about it, i should probably just see the good doctor and see what they say. who knows, maybe it's not really a cyst, maybe it's a tooth and i can use my one free dental visit to have it removed.