this week has been hard. exhausting, really. i had no idea i could be sad, i had no idea i could go to work while that sad, i had no idea that you can feel the sad like a full-body bruise.
i'm lucky that i have plenty of people who love and care about me and for me. seriously, truly, fortunate in that regard. i feel awful that i'm such a shit to be around right now!
i only worked two days this week, but i think that was pretty much all i could handle. this weekend i plan on doing not much of anything; D has to work a lot, and has a lot of homework to do, and the kids are finishing up their spring break. if the weather holds, i'm going to try to squirrel them off someplace fun to treat them. they were absolute dolls this past week; they deserve some laser tag or arcade games, comic books, movies and/or pizza. there is a big part of me that just wants to crawl into bed and not get out of it for the next 48 hours, but if i start there i might not stop. plus, that sort of lifestyle will just lead to me becoming a 500 lb shut-in, and i'm pretty sure that would piss my pop off royally*.
*i still cannot bring myself to use past tense. i can't do it, i cry too hard. i'm a retard.