well this was inevitable

it wasn't a fight, exactly, but it wasn't fun. a very, very late conversation was initiated last night that ate most of my sleep time away. then this morning after three hours of sleep and the latest start on earth (i was a half hour late to work because the boyfriend forgot to set the alarm!) i find out that he might have been spazzing out because he'd had too many beers and not enough dinner.

i understand that it's normal for people to feel kind of freaked out by how they feel, but i've never understood the need to have a talk about "what if you leave me." i've also never been good at talking about my feelings, except to describe them as ones that feel good, and ones that feel lousy. i am woefully inept at the "talk" which makes me most guys fantasy girl. however, my man likes to talk about his feelings because he's a goddamn hippy*. just because i'm not good at it doesn't mean i can't do it, or am unwilling. however, at two a.m. when i am confused and tired you probably shouldn't bring up the big issues of your various insecurities because i will go into panic/confused mode and not be any good at listening or knowing what's going on.

i will also end up irritated that i'm exhausted all day at work while your teachers let you go home early because you look tired and they love you. i'm not mad, exactly, and i think in the end we had a good talk and he feels better about a lot of things, but dammit. today just kind of sucked.

*i might have a touch of the premenstruals, making me more snippy than usual!