want to see something funny?

i wrote a blog post a while ago, but never posted it because i got distracted. i was going through things here, cleaning stuff up, deleting drafts, when i stopped and read this one. it was titled "i think i wanna be a step-milf."

i had a very interesting talk with a friend today, where i disclosed that i would, indeed, be quite pleased to be a step-mother. or probably the live-in girlfriend of the dad, because i'm not always too sure i want to get married. to me, that's pretty close to being a step-mom, and that is appealing. i do honestly enjoy children. the kids i know are all impossibly smart and sweet and good-looking (except for the one who steals my shit! she's not on the top of my list!) and i enjoy 99% of every minute i'm with them. at the same time, when i think about having kids of my own i'm conflicted. why try to compete with the kids i already know? what if i don't do nearly as good a job as my friends and family? i'm not always sure i have the patience for parenting. i also feel like i should have done it sooner: i've given myself entirely too much time to think about all the things that could go wrong, and have freaked myself out.

the boy before last had a kid (still does!) and i liked that. watching him interact with his child was awesome. for the first time i dated someone who enjoyed being a parent, and put their kid first. it was strangely hot, and such a nice change of pace. the only other men i've dated with kids were maybe not the best dads, and that was always such a turn-off. although, to be fair, i have not dated very many men with children. at my age, though, it's getting more and more common.

which leads me to my next thought; i have this incredibly cute customer at work who's been coming in for years, and he has very sweet kids. a boy and a girl, and i just realized in all the time he's been shopping at my store i've never seen him without his kids, or with a woman. for that matter, i can't recall ever seeing the kids with their mom, which makes me wonder if he isn't divorced. he's got nice crinkly blue eyes, good hair, and a great smile. i pointed him out to a co-worker the other day, and she agreed that he is indeed handsome. for the first time i thought, "hey wait! he might be date-able!"

hee hee hee... oh boy. if only i'd known. daydreaming about my boyfriend was fun before i knew him, but to be perfectly honest, he's a lot more fun now that i've had him in real life. i took my friends out to see him last night and even my sister came out to meet him! everyone agrees that he is just as handsome as i said he was, and we all had a very good time. it's funny how things worked out, funny and delightful and surprising.